How to develop the counsellor-counselee relationship?

There are 3 major stages in the Counselling process can be described as follows:

    1. Developing a counsellor counselee relationship
    2. Working in  a counsellor counselee relationship
    3. Terminating  a counsellor counselee relationship

1) Developing a counsellor-counselee relationship

    • Laying foundations for trust
    • Establishing the structure and form the relationship will take
    • Informed consent process
    • Articulating roles of counselor and client and developing a collaborative working alliance
    • The “getting to know you” phase is the most critical stage of the relationship.

The counselor should work on the following things during this stage:

  1. Developing Rapport and Building Trust
  2. Create core conditions necessary for counselling




1. Developing Rapport and Building Trust- 

  • It is vital to take care of following aspects in first steps Development of counsellor counselee relationship
  • i) Predictability and consistency

    • it is critical.
    • If the counsellor schedules an appointment to meet the client at a certain time, it’s important to keep it.
    • It is understandable that at times things come up and appointments cannot be kept.
    • Consistency is the key to speed up the trust building process.
  • ii) Testing

    • Young people generally do not trust adults.
    • So they test/check with a coping or defense mechanism to determine whether they can trust the counsellor.
    • They will assess to see if the counsellor really cares about them.
    • A client might test the counsellor by not reaching for a scheduled meeting to see how the counsellor will react
  • iii) Establish confidentiality

    • It helps in developing trust.
    • The counsellor should let the client know that whatever he/ she wants to share with the counsellor will remain confidential, as long as (and it’s important to stress this point) what the client tells the counsellor is not going to harm the client or someone else.
    • It’s helpful to stress this up front, within the first few meetings with the client.
    • Later on if the counsellor needs to break the confidence because the information the client shared was going to harm him or her or someone else, the client will not feel betrayed.
  • iv) Goal setting (transitions into Stage 2)

    • It is helpful during Stage 1 to take the time to set at least one achievable goal together for the relationship.
    • What do the client and counsellor want to get out of this relationship?
    • It is also good to help the client set personal goals.
    • Sometimes the client does not know how to set goals, and this will provide them with the opportunity to set goals and work toward achieving them.
    • Client might test the counsellor by not reaching for a scheduled meeting to see how the counsellor will react.




2) Creating  Core Conditions Necessary for Successful Counselling-

  • Rogers (1957) originally proposed core conditions needed in building a relationship:
    • i) Empathetic understanding: Empathy promotes rapport and relationship.
    • ii) Unconditional positive regard: Considering Client as person of worth, and is separate from actions.
    • iii) Congruence: Showing Genuine self in client interaction
  • Carkuff (1969) adds to these
    • i) Respect: It strengthens the focus.
    • ii) Confrontation: It promotes realistic and accurate view.
    • iii) Immediacy: Consideration of problem with Here and Now attitude.
    • iv) Concreteness: Paying attention on what is practical in the process
    • v) Self disclosure: Promoting positive perception and appropriate focus in counseling relationship.




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